Paul J. Bucknell

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Understanding Correction | Avoiding Light | Catch the Sin | Control the Child | Correct the Child

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What would be considered the most effective and caring form of discipline for a disobedient child? And why?

Avoiding Light

(Part 2/5)

“...and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed.”

Relationship with God

Our attention and love is directed by our moral inclinations. If we are pressed to closely associate with those that we have offended, we mask our true selves so that our evil thoughts are not exposed.

When man commits evil, then this a pattern of hiding from God begins developing, along with anyone else that one has offended. The darkness is stored up in our ‘deep pockets’.

We can call it the ‘hate the light’ syndrome. Until the darkness is eliminated, a person will shy away from God. If the person has to relate to God or the one he has offended, then the person burdened with ‘pockets filled with evil’ will need to devise ways to both excuse what he has done as well as pretend that all is well. If relationships are formed, they will be superficial and built on deceit.

Our BFF Parenting Digital Library holds all our BFF parenting resources including slides, audio/videos, etc!

Unconfessed sin always leads to a distasteful lukewarm love for God which will eventually move a person to lukewarm churches or to leave God. Do we need to force ourselves to worship or simply change churches to find a more compatible teaching that fits our hearts? Or should would, deal with our sin and establish our love for others?

Relationship with People

The same situation occurs in personal relationships like between parents and children. When children have sin hidden away in their hearts, they try to escape the home. If not, they deceive their parents, or whoever they are offended by.

If sin is not dealt with, then it is stored in the heart, and it increasingly makes it more difficult for the child to listen to God or talk with their parents.

No wonder that many children when a bit older just revolt against their parents. They basically insist on an independent lifestyle virtually unchallenged by their parents’ directives.

There is no real unsurprising teenage rebellion. That extra tension in teenage years is an accumulation of hidden sin. Before the child was deceiving the parent but now feels like he or she needs to escape. What is really needed is for the parents and children to apologize for their sins against each other.

The parents should, upon sensing such tension between themselves and their children, call everyone together to resolve this situation.

Piling the Sins Up

I further explained to my son that when there is sin in your heart, then there are probably more sins in the pocket than you think. Once the pocket has something in it, it becomes easier to throw other things in with them. This is where Christians become hypocritical. As sins pile up, their hearts are hardened. The only way out is to confess ones sin and apologize. Fortunately, the blood of Christ can forgive any sin.

Let’s take this case where my son lied to me. He first of all has sinned against God and then against me as his Dad. When we understand these dynamics of isolation, superficiality and deceit, we can see that no person will grow under such circumstances. The father and son should be able to share on all levels.

When the child has to hide a certain aspect of his life, then not only will he continue to deceive, but he will never receive help in that area. It is for these reasons that parents need to apply God’s method of correction.

Continue reading =>

The 3 C’s to Disciplining our Children (3/5)

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The BFF Parenting Library has all the Biblical Parenting Principles for Toddlers materials in printable form as well as the available Powerpoint slideshows and handouts for each session. We have even now inlcuded 9 full length Parenting videos (or audios). Click the picture for more information. Loads of teaching materials too. More info. Or look at the BFF Marriage Library.

Our own family has gone through most of the problems families face twice. With eight children, some fully grown and our youngest at 18 months, we can see the whole process at once. We see the results of what works and what doesn't work. But even more, we have carefully studied and applied God's Word to parenting. You will be astonished to see how clearly God cares for you by presenting you answers for your practical parenting problems with lots of charts and graphics!

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Biblical Foundations for Freedom ( BFF )

Rev. Paul J. Bucknell

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