- BFF Home
- About Us
- Life Truths
- RSS Feed
Developing Proper Church Relationships is part of the Take Your Next Step into Ministry series that shows how to carry on good and proper relationships with one's home church and making sure clear communication is occurring.
Carry on good and proper relationships with those in one’s home church. Make sure clear communication is occurring.
Something is drastically wrong with our training. Many churches are filled with divisive people and focus on church politics3 rather than on following the Lord. Others have experienced an actual church split. You are rare if you do not know of such a church.
The Lord, however, wants to train up leaders like Jesus that were bold but tender to Him. The modern spirit of individualism often prevents us from knowing how to wait upon God when tension arises with those in authority over us.
Part of the problem is that we do not know how to relate to those in authority over us nor depend upon the Lord to carry out an effective ministry. Because we move around so much, we can easily avoid ‘conflict’ until we are out in the mission field! That is a mistake.
The Lord is very interested in training us in this area. Even Jesus’ disciples faced this problem! Let’s try to simply introduce this training process and then follow through with some questions to help you think through the way you can relate to others.
Our hearts are tested by the relationships around us. Training in how to carry on good relationships should happen in the family when one grows up. In these most recent generations many are not receiving this training. This problem has worsened as few grow up in larger families. Others have never seen the model of a good family. Others do not know how to biblically (rightly) respect authority and care for those under our charge.
The church is a good place to learn these things too. This happens, for example, when we know there is a better way to do something. Do you then ‘follow’ your advice or your elder’s contrary advice? Do you treat your opinion as equal or better to the one who is in authority? How do you handle the situation? Do you get resentful or speak against the leaders?
As we respect our leaders, then we can learn from them, even if they make poor decisions. When we learn from them, then they will encourage us to excel and enter into ministry. If we insist on doing it our own way, then we will find relationships in the church quite strained.
The scriptures tell us to honor our elders. The way we respond to our elders gives us a good picture of our humility or pride. We need to be willing to trust the Lord with our great dreams and plans in the face of what we might think is some dull and ineffective scheme advanced by another. This is the time we need to wait upon the Lord and seek Him about how to do carry out His ministry. He will amazingly open doors for us.
Do you attend the church business meetings? How come they hold them this way?
Have you ever sat in at an elder, deacon or coworker’s meeting? What did you think?
How do you respond when you believe you have a better way of doing something?
What if the church leaders ask you to handle some smaller task? How do you respond?4
Do you value the church leaders’ guidance? What makes you so sure of this?
Have you learned the secret to honor your elders with whom you disagree?
How well do you know your church leaders? List them and pray for them regularly.
What concrete ways have you used to get to know them better? Make some more plans.
Have you communicated to your church leaders how God has been working in your heart and life?
How do they respond to your interest in missions or other full-time service? Are they hesitant? Move too slowly? Disagree with you? Affirm you? What is your response? Why?
Have you asked them in what areas you could be better trained? Ask and learn from them!
Have you ever been mentored by anyone?
Is someone now mentoring you who knows your burden for ministry? Have you shared your whole vision with them?
Have you shared with him/her the different obstacles you face to reach that goal?
Set out a plan and see in which area they could help you.
The most effective minister is the one who does not focus on completing certain qualifications for the ministry, but the one that persistently pursues the Lord throughout his life training. Persistent pursuit of the Lord is necessary because of our sinful heart, forgetfulness and temptations that we face during our lives. Seeking the Lord is also needed because of the nature of our relationship with God.
Moses saw the burning bush at the beginning of His ministry but that was not sufficient to sustain him throughout his service to the Lord. The Lord knew that there was much more to knowing God and spent His life pursuing a deeper relationship with Him (Exodus 33:13-14).
“Now therefore, I pray Thee, if I have found favor in They sight, let me know Thy ways, that I may know Thee, so that I may find favor in Thy sight” (Exodus 33:13).
An effective ministry is built on a deepening relationship with our gracious God. Therefore preparing ourselves for effective ministry is an ongoing task. There are standards and qualifications to meet, but fruitful ministry flows from an ongoing relationship with God through Christ.
Each of the four general areas that were mentioned above assists us to keep growing in that relationship with God.
Acquire skills helps us do things God’s way.
Character building enables us to develop a more holy life so that we can be closer to God and listen carefully to Him.
Good support reminds us of the broader context in which God works through His whole body.
Proper relationships enable us to thoroughly enjoy working with others through Christ’s love.
How exciting it is to realize that the call to serve Him is also an invitation to know Him more!
This concludes this series: Take Your Next Step into Ministry
Check out: Training Up Leaders for Full-time Ministry