Christians are no different than the rest of the world in these matters. Our eight children shock people. These people on the whole are happy for us but sometimes really question our sincerity to live as responsible citizens. Is it possible that now we think it is more moral to use birth control methods? We must begin to think these issues through biblically rather than just going with the flow of the world.

A. Thinking Biblically about Birth Control

Here are a few starter questions. Think through them on your own.

·       What is the Biblical basis for using condoms and other birth-control devices?

We need to be more aware of the lack of scriptural injunction to save the earth by reducing the number of our children or by thinking that we can’t rightly bring up more than one or two children.

·       How has the usage of birth control methods possibly affected how God has or will work through you as an individual and a family?

We will never know how our lives will be different from what they could have been had we had more children. My heart is sad thinking about the number of children I might be missing because of the condom choice. Empty chairs sit around the table.

·       In what ways has the use of birth control devices shaped your male and female roles and perspectives?

Nothing has aided feminism more than the pill and other birth control methods. By neutering woman she has the 'wo' stripped from her womanhood. She now wants to be more like man. She doesn’t think she could be fulfilled unless she acts and talks like a man. She is deceived. All of this rejects God’s purposed and beautiful design of woman.

B. Biblical Principles from Genesis 1:28

And God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky, and over every living thing that moves on the earth." (Genesis 1:28)

Here are some biblical principles drawn from Genesis 1:28 and other verses speaking on the blessing of children throughout the scriptures. Just like marriage and other teachings, these statements have an overwhelming affect on the way we make our life decisions. We will only focus on Christian families and their sense of family planning.

• We should not generally use birth control. The teaching 'be fruitful and multiply' is a truth which begs to teach wisdom to those advocating birth control. This command to 'be fruitful and multiply' is one of God's great commandments, which shape our overall lives.

  We should see having many children as one of God's great designs to accomplish His greater purposes in our lives and in His kingdom. We may or may not understand how He can use our families. This doesn’t matter. As we trust Him, He will reveal this.

  We need to focus on having many children. We should expect, hope and pray for many children. If we only reluctantly accept our duty rather than eagerly accept it, then our hearts toward God, our children and perhaps our spouse will be far short of what it needs to be.

  We should not be content with the usual one or two children unless God has given us only this number. Some wonder whether they can handle a greater number of children. God has shared in His Word how to raise godly children under full control.

  We should not allow our socio-economic situation control the number of children we have. Some children will be poor and others live through times of oppression. We can fully trust God with these circumstances for after all they are His creation. We trust God will provide and accomplish His greater purposes because of our faith. Moses is just one example.

  We should focus on raising godly children that will bring greater blessings to the world. God saves those outside the family and inside the family. Why should we neglect this means of growing God's family. Here is one example I just read of in Ukraine.
  
  "One pastor and his wife-- have 13 children and six grandchildren--and four church plants in progress--are already examples of visual multiplication!"

  We should not allow the population control movement affect the number of children that we have since they have clearly failed to follow God's Word in that they:

(1)  Are willing to kill or abort children and deceive parents to accomplish their goals.

(2)  Do not at all appreciate God's command to have more children.

(3)   Make their choices by worrying about preserving the earth rather than trusting God and the resources He has provided.

(4)   Have devised principles that simply are not true. For example, they predicted so many people would die from starvation because of overpopulation. Instead we have seen through discoveries and technology all the fears were false. God has provided through specialization of labor. We now produce far more food through fewer people and lands!

If we had money for such an organization, we should use it to help countries and families be creative in caring for larger populations and families God’s ways.

 

C. Summary Perspectives from Genesis 1:28

   God wants to give His people many children so that He can replicate His love and obedience through our many children. We do this in hope that many more people on this earth are influenced by His truth and love.

   Is birth control helping or hindering the process? We know it hinders. Then why do God's people go against God's principles which are designed to bring greater blessings? God's people do not believe or trust God's good design.

   Why should God's people suffer by refusing to have more children? This is where most Christian people are at. They are actually using God's gifts to bring a curse to the area God wants a great blessing. It is as if they say, "Sorry God, I rather not have your blessing. I want my way. I want other things."

   Many children could be raised as godly children but are not. This is a shame to the parents and reflects how parents are not living by God's designs. They are either ignorant or simply do not trust God's Word enough to obey it.

   What about the many more men and women of God that could be zealously serving Him but were never born? Why? Mostly due to lack of faith and a belief that the wife is not important if she doesn't make money. Why? They don't believe they have enough money to care for children. They will face the poor Africans one day that will testify against them.

   Is it possible that many marital problems are partly due to not being able to trust God in this area of their lives? Once we take this area into our own hands it produces a "my right" mentality. We feel it is our right and duty to make practical decisions apart from the Lord. This attitude is devastating to a couple who has disagreements.

   I grieve at the children that we might have had if we were not so weak from faith and selfishness. If we were really concerned about the next generation, we would raise up many godly children.

Are we any different from those who offered the lives of their children to Molech? Probably not. May God have mercy on us. May He change our hearts so that we might not cause others to suffer due to our selfishness, laziness, greed and blindness.

D. Our Personal Testimony

We like most couples started off into marriage so excited. We also had the pressures of life. In our case earlier on in our lives we were trying to get through university, internship and Chinese language school. They involve a lot of money and time. Later on we were involved in an intense Christian ministry.

We were willing to only have a few children because of our situation. We played the strategists figuring out when best to have children. We were sure that we knew better than God. God tried to teach us early on. He frustrated our university plans by slipping in an unexpected child. My wife had to resign her good paying job, and I had to work extra while attending university and being active in church ministry.

The best thing in the world was for God to give us our first daughter. We love her. Without God intruding in on 'our schedule', she wouldn't have existed. Right now she is 25 and serving volunteer short term in India using her graphic artist skills to help produce literacy books for recently reached tribes so that they can read the Bible.

If we were gifted with insight rather than hindsight (too late), we would have cut off birth control a whole lot earlier in life. We had our troubles trying to have children. We had a few miscarriages. These situations sure grieved our soul. In the Bible miscarriages are often associated with God's displeasure. Was He unhappy because we still tried to fit children into our schedules? Is it possible that when we wanted a child, He held His blessing back? Is God possibly trying to tell us that we are interfering with His plans by thinking we know better than Him on this matter? We think so.

We were such slow learners. We had our second child overseas. We then had a long break. I guess we just wanted to keep in charge of things. God graciously started to change our hearts and minds with the coming of our third child about six years after our second child. There were a number of truths that God began to teach us.

1)     Children are precious. We should want more of them than less.

2)     Children are to be a delight. We should enjoy them rather than be frustrated how they might interrupt our schedules. We need to trust God for more grace.

3)     God has taught us in His Word how to raise godly children. We had to repent and change the way we cared for our children.[1]

4)     We put the condoms away. We gave God control over the children that we would have.

The results are delightful. We now have eight children with the youngest being 3 years old. We will have no empty nest syndrome! We raise children who fear God.  People like being with our children. We are training them to be a blessing to others. While we do this, they are quite manageable. We consider God’s schedule for having children the best. Although we are moving out of childbearing years, we still welcome God’s plan for us.

As a couple, since we have thrown the condom away. We have saved lots of money. But that is trivial compared to the increased unity we have sensed in our marriage. We are able to trust God together for what He has for us. We trust God together to provide for all their future needs. We anticipate how God is going to use them. Right now we need to be consistently training them by providing a vision for godly living.

 We don't have things other couples might have if they didn't have children. That is fine. We have something much better. We have trusted God more and our children are much better trained. Our older girls are convinced how to properly raise children that God one day might give to them. They really appreciate seeing what God has done through their little siblings.  When God had finally taught us to enjoy our children, then we could indeed enjoy His precious gifts. We have learned that having a godly family is one key thing He wants for all families.

We have failed Him at strategic times in the past. Our doubt in His wise oversight didn’t help us more effectively minister. God knows our hearts. He would have done much more had we been able to fully trust Him in these matters. We are so appreciative of His forgiveness through Jesus Christ.

God is the one who gives life. If anyone wants to do a study on birth control in the Bible, just study how God opened and closed wombs. God specifically regulates the ability to give birth. This also teaches us not to make a blanket observation that a childless couple is in sin. They could be another Abraham and Sarah.

We should also remember, though, that God has a general plan for us. We have learned to trust God within His monthly cycle that He designed for women. We have observed two Old Testament commands regarding timing of intimacy. One asks us to abstain for a certain period after birth. The other command is to abstain during the wife’s menstrual cycle.[1]

·       God has given us our last six children about two years apart.

·       God has provided more disciplined children (not perfect).

·       God has given us a closer marriage.

·       God has given us a wonderful growing and trusting relationship with Him.

·       God has given us a grand big family.

·       God has provided for our needs. We receive less than others but somehow manage.

We have learned that birth control is an issue that has to do with our relationship with God as well as our spouse. Birth control is a moral issue that has great ramifications on our lives and how God is going to use us. God wants us to trust Him with who and when He brings children into our family. When people tell me that I am 'abusing' my wife, I simply tell them that my wife at 48 still asks God for more children. We want to be open to God's best plan. We finally can admit that we do not know what that plan is. We are waiting upon God for His best.